The most rewarding and precious work I’ve ever done was taking care of my mom. I was sad when last year this time, I no longer had that work. She went to rest in God’s hands, to enjoy all that heaven has to offer, and I’ve thanked her daily for the blessings she brought to our home since she moved in with us.
My mother spent the last five years of her life living in my home. She had dementia and was bound to a wheelchair and taking care of her was challenging, but it was also a huge blessing. The memories and teachings she left behind helped me understand why Chaldean family and friends always said to me in our native Aramaic tongue, “Ittagh edjal” which translates to something close to “You have points in heaven.”
I brought my mom into our home for numerous reason, the major one being that I wanted her to be surrounded by the thing that was most dear to her – her family. I wanted her to leave this earth feeling loved and wanted. I also wanted my children to get to better know their grandmother and for them to learn compassion – not through books and other intellectual ways that have no real substance, but through experience.
That’s why after I learned about Manish Patel’s book, I invited him on my show. He wrote Second Childhood, which talks about the importance of taking care of the elderly, especially our parents. Manish was driving from his home to his office on one of the most beautiful sunny days. At the time, he was so busy with his work and family life that he didn’t make time to write, even though his mind was full of thoughts about Second Childhood. Instead of trying to find time to write, he decided to record his thoughts while driving.
While driving that day, Manish discovered the true meaning of the word “Parent.” He heard a whisper from, and was thankful to, God to learn that the word symbolized our duty to “pay rent.” He writes in his book, “We never forget to pay rent for our house, office or other services, so how can we forget to pay the most important rent to our parents? Like other collection agencies, God is the highest special collection agency. Rent can be paid in the form of respect and love.”
Chapter after chapter, Manish shows the importance of us looking at what really matters and not getting lost in our busy daily lives. He reminds us that if we fall short of interaction within a circle, we no longer are part of a circle. At some point, without attention, our circles and cycles are broken and compromised. He warns, “Let’s not reach a point where we have to say, If only I gave a little more effort, if only I tried harder, things would have been better. If only I paid more attention when I needed to…”
Taking my mother into our home was one of the best decisions I made. She and I learned so much from each other those last five years. We served one another, each in our own special ways. My conscious is at rest. I am at peace as I continue my relationship with her in Spirit and as I enjoy those “points in heaven” here on earth.